Oh No, Not Another Interuption, How To Deal With Everyday Distractions
Every day I find junk mail waiting for me, whether it is
snail mail or email. Unless I deal with it immediately, I
will be faced with piles of unwanted paper, or a full inbox,
which just distracts me. It can be very frustrating trying
to find something which is buried in a drawer or hidden
under a pile of papers. Not only is this distracting but it
also takes time and can lead to added stress. Every time you
look at a pile of untidy papers you may just notice yourself
sighing and notice, too, how your energy is diverted into
feeling guilty about one more task not yet done. Clear away the clutter - anything that will distract you,
anything that takes up space, either physically or mentally.
Examples include: an untidy desk or car
a pile of unpaid bills
a disorganised wardrobe
unwanted gifts What takes away your time and energy? Examples include:
chatting on the phone or round the coffee machine
friends dropping round unannounced on a regular basis
relationships not working
searching for things that you can't remember where you left Just as we put sunscreen on us to protect against the
harmful rays of the sun, we sometimes need to protect
ourselves from people, places and things. Prevention is
better than cure! You can't stop other people from being
negative or living their lives from one drama to another,
but you can stop yourself from being sucked in by them. Dawn had reached the point when all she wanted to do was
hand her notice in at work. As she was so behind with her
work, she logged on to her computer at home, after she had
put her children to bed. So much for trying to combine
motherhood with work - it just didn't seem to be working.
During the day, her team continually interrupted her when
she was about to start on her work, with questions she felt
that they really ought to know the answer to. "Why can't
they work it out for themselves?" she said. She realised that she had fallen into the trap, as so many
managers do, of sorting out the problems for her team
without encouraging them to come up with their own answers
first. She would ask them to leave it with her. And of
course, that was a monkey off their backs and one more on to
hers. No wonder she felt stressed most of the time at work. So she did two things to combat the problem. She increased
the number of one-to-ones with her staff, and used the time
to talk through her team's workload and some of the issues
they were facing. For the first time in a long time her team
took responsibility for their own work. Second, instead of
inviting them to leave problems with her, she either asked
them to come back with their own ideas, e.g. a draft of a
letter, or suggested that she would meet with them later in
the day, by which time they had normally sorted things out
for themselves. Dawn recognised that her role as a team manager had not
always been as clear as it might have been. She thought she
was supporting them by doing their work for them. "I thought
I was in control but nothing was further from the truth. I
hadn't realised how much the regular interruptions and my
poor time management contributed to stress." Her team,
although shocked at first, started to thrive. They started
to feel more confident in their own abilities to solve
problems, and Dawn was always there when they needed
support. She also seemed to be a lot less short tempered
with them, which they appreciated. In reducing interruptions from her team, Dawn was setting
stronger personal boundaries. You can choose how you react or respond to others. You may
find yourself reacting in the moment then spending the next
two days feeling awful that you snapped at someone. All that
time you are occupied with these thoughts and you could be
doing something about reducing the stress in your life.
Think before you act even if it just for 30 seconds. Emotions may get the better of you on occasion, if they do
you can stop things from escalating and causing more stress. Most of us find it is hard enough to change ourselves. It is
even more difficult to change others. So if you find
yourself stressed by the actions of others, change how you
react, rather than expecting others to change. As you change, watch others change around you! Carolyn Matheson is a nationally recognized Coach,
Speaker and Author of "Yes to Less Stress." Carolyn is a Master Certified Coach, and works with executives and their teams across the
world. She has pioneered an innovative approach to coaching,
combining many years of high performance coaching with a
holistic approach to work/life balance and has coached
hundreds of leaders and their teams. Her experience as a
presenter, both nationally and internationally, spans 20
years, with clients currently in Europe, Australia, the
Middle and Far East, and the USA. Her new book, Yes to Less Stress is
available online at her website, http://www.areustressed.com
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